## [FF][RT?]Harry Potter and the Secret of the Patronus: Chapter 5

* Author: u/Ms_CIA  *Derp**
* URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12975806/5/Harry-Potter-and-the-Secret-of-the-Patronus
* Score: 8

* Created: 2018-07-17T19:31:52

### Post:

[Link to content](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12975806/5/Harry-Potter-and-the-Secret-of-the-Patronus)

### Comments:

> **u/kaukamieli** [+7]  (35 minutes later)
> 
> I just reached the list in the first chapter and I don't like those arguments.
> 
> 1. As people live longer and have "better life", they tend to get less children. Also they have magic to terraform the universe with and they can learn all the secrets of magic without losing a ton as they don't die.
> 
> 2. Wtf? Would Harry have given immortality to everyone else than blood purists? They can start a war anyway, but Harry would have a chance to make his side overpowered before that.
> 
> 3. Remake what? If it means the earlier fabric, meh. Society has gone through changes before and this would be a good change. Things changing doesn't mean that society would be broken until personally fixed.
> 
> 4. Harry already has shit like the invisibility cloak, which is definitely assassination worthy for many. With controlling dementors and all the other stuff he already has a ton of such secrets. Losing information like this would be idiocy.

>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+2]  *Derp* (an hour later)
>> 
>>  I can see your point, but keep in mind that these are common arguments against pursuing immortality. Whether or not you or I agree with them, they exist, and plenty of people believe them. In this story, Harry is dubious about them as well, as fits his character.
>> 
>> This work of fiction is not didactic. I'm not trying to teach anyone or sway anyone to an ideology. There were a couple reasons I went the Obliviation route, but one of them is, it's really hard to write a humorous, relatable coming of age story when the character is god-level overpowered compared to his peers. The other reasons are plot related, and will be revealed in later chapters. :)

>>> **u/Throwitover9000** [+3]  (2 hours later)
>>> 
>>> > In this story, Harry is dubious about them as well, as fits his character.
>>> 
>>> Then this is not a sequel of HPMOR. Harry James Potter Evans-Verres, like his author Eliezer Yudkowsky, has the wish for destruction of death and immortality for ***all*** written in to the core of his character beyond even rational/logical conclusions.

>>>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (4 hours later)
>>>> 
>>>> Lol, I think you misunderstood me. He *does* wish for the destruction of death and immortality for all and he *doesn't* agree with the reasons in the letter. If he had the choice to get his memories back, he'd do it in a heartbeat.

>>>>> **u/kaukamieli** [+1]  (7 hours later)
>>>>> 
>>>>> I guess this has some spoilers then, as I thought he decided himself to lose the memories.

>>>>>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (7 hours later)
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> Maybe he did, maybe he didn't. :)

> **u/Ms_CIA** [+3]  *Derp* (5 minutes later)
> 
> I reached chapter 5, and I’m honestly curious about this subreddit’s thoughts on this story. I contemplated which chapter to post, and I chose the most potentially controversial one I've written so far, because that makes sense, right?
> 
> It’s a sequel to HPMOR, but I'm not sure that it's rational fiction, per se. It's a character driven mystery plot with humor and romance. However, I read the side bar, and I think it complies with the bullet points for \[RT\]. So...maybe I'm in the right place?
> 
> Either way, I thought you guys might at least be curious enough to take a look. :)
> 
> Let me know what you think of it so far, I love honest feedback!

>> **u/best_cat** [+2]  (4 hours later)
>> 
>> The introduction was a bit hard for me to get my head around.  I think the problem is that the pieces were presented a bit out of chronological order.  From what I can tell, the time periods are:
>> 
>> > [End Of HPMOR + 1 month] "Are you ... absolutely sure?"
>> >
>> > [EO HPMOR + 3 years] Harry bounced on his feet
>> >
>> > [EO HPMOR - 1 year] If Harry had heard that account in his first year
>> >
>> > [EO HPMOR + 3 years] Harry glanced down at his present
>> >
>> > [EO HPMOR + 6 months] On the summer after his first year in Hogwarts
>> >
>> > [EO HPMOR + 3 years] Someone was forcefully rubbing his hair.
>> 
>> I might suggest re-ordering the introduction a bit so there aren't as many flashbacks.  In this case, the story seems to start when Harry loses his memory.  Open there.
>> 
>> My next question is how long it took before finding the letter.  Was there a while where Harry knew that someone had tampered with his head, but didn't know why?  If so, how did he react?
>> 
>> Alternately, did he wake up next to the letter?  If that happened, did he take any steps to verify that he was the one who wrote it?  What sort of arguments did he use to explain that "going to space" made more sense than trying to recreate his original discovery?  He has notes, right?

>>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (5 hours later)
>>> 
>>>  Uggh, yes...flashbacks are rarely a good way to go, most often it's better to write linear. So, in theory, I totally agree with you. The first chapter was a struggle, because while it's important to jump into the story, as a sequel fic, readers will need to get caught up on past events.
>>> 
>>> I debated trying out your suggestion, but there's a reason it would be difficult to implement. Starting with a letter will probably slow down the story for new readers. Not everyone reading my fic has read HPMOR, some of them just like the AU setting. For them, reading through a chapter of Harry finding the letter, authenticating it, talking to Hermione, etc., would be even more confusing than flashbacks. It would probably also be really boring (for them), and set the wrong tone for the beginning of the story.
>>> 
>>> (Also, there may or may not be a plot reason why there are no scenes of them reading the letters.)
>>> 
>>> As for your questions: I'd say anywhere from a week to a month later is when Harry receives his letter. He doesn't know his mind is tampered with until he receives it. Then he has to decide if he's going to believe this letter is true, and not a prank or worse. 
>>> 
>>> He does not remember anything about discovering immortality, and wouldn't even know the first steps in trying to recreate it. It's likely he would have tried anyway, realized that was going nowhere and kept working on his space exploration plan...while still keeping his original goal (immortality research) on the back burner.
>>> 
>>> As to how the letters were received, his arguments, the decision to go to space, etc., that all gets explained later in the story.
>>> 
>>> I think I underestimated how many people would want more explanation as to why Harry would allow Obliviation. Maybe if I think this over I can add a few lines to explain it better. Thanks for the feedback. :)

> **u/MaddoScientisto** [+3]  (11 hours later)
> 
> I really enjoyed this, very well written, although I was pretty confused in the first chapters because harry kept being vague about stuff, it got better though.
> 
> I can't wait to read more, hope you go far with this

>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (12 hours later)
>> 
>> Thank you, I'm glad you liked it! Most of the chapters are already written, and I try to post once a week. :)
>> 
>> If you don't mind elaborating, which parts seemed too vague? I might be able to fix it.

>>> **u/MaddoScientisto** [+1]  (a day later)
>>> 
>>> Sadly I'd have to reread the whole thing to find again the place I was talking about and I don't really feel like doing that, all I recall was Harry in the first 2 or 3 chapters talking about stuff without mentioning what the stuff was about, it was kind of hard to follow

>>>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (a day later)
>>>> 
>>>> Some of that might have been me trying to create a sense of mystery, holding back some information to build suspense, lol. But I'm not entirely sure, and I definitely don't want to confuse people. I'll do another read through and see if I find anything I can fix. Thanks. :)

> **u/Nimelennar** [+2]  (3 hours later)
> 
> I notice that I am confused about a few things.
> 
> First, why do they have DADA professors?  At Quirrel's funeral, they made a resolution that older students would teach younger students Battle Magic from then on, rather than have DADA professors who might get cursed.
> 
> Second, what exactly do you mean by this (Chapter 3):
> 
> >The problem was distance. The closest star system was several light years away. Even if humans mined all the plutonium on Earth and created a rocket ship that ran on cold fusion, there simply wouldn't be enough available energy to travel that far. It was also currently impossible to build a rocket that could navigate deep space, communicate with Earth, sustain life for long periods of time, and keep the astronauts from killing each other out of boredom.
> 
> ...Other than "sustain life" (especially over the duration that such a journey would take), none of that seems anywhere *near* impossible, and I have no idea where you're getting the energy levels you're talking about.
> 
> Third: How is the transfiguration being sustained?  Philosopher's Stone is not an option, as that would be the same as killing the person-who-is-a-stone.
> 
> Fourth: The harsh treatment being inflicted upon Hermione by Madam Bones seems like military indoctrination, which isn't there to make you stronger.  It's intended to make you *weaker,* to break down your will, so that you'll readily accept hierarchy and new norms uncritically.  Which does kind of match up with the description of the Auror tests, but... the characters keep saying that it's to make her stronger.  Are the characters just wrong about what the effects of this kind of indoctrination are supposed to be, and this is going to be cleared up later?

>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (4 hours later)
>> 
>> Some detailed questions here. :) Lemmie go look up all my data...lol.
>> 
>> The DADA professor remark was made by a student in a eulogy, not a professor or a representative at the school. My interpretation of that event is that the students would continue to teach each other battle magic (which explains the resurgence of dueling at the school), but the headmasters would continue to hire a professor for the DADA position. And honestly, it might seem silly but...I just love Tonks being a Defence professor.
>> 
>> A lot of the information from the paragraph in Chapter 3 is related to information from this article. [https://www.wired.com/2016/02/space-is-cold-vast-and-deadly-humans-will-explore-it-anyway/](https://www.wired.com/2016/02/space-is-cold-vast-and-deadly-humans-will-explore-it-anyway/) 
>> 
>> Basically, it's not *entirely* impossible, it's just *currently* impossible. There are solutions that might work, but most are theoretical. As for the line about energy consumption, I do remember reading about this, but it's possible I made a mistake. I'll have to do some research and double check with a friend who knows about rocket science.
>> 
>> What do you mean by sustaining transfiguration? Are we talking about Quirrell in Harry's ring? As for that, err...spoilers.
>> 
>> Yes, the indoctrination thing will be cleared up later. I disagree with their philosophy, and you're right, it's a bit extreme. However, institutionalized hazing is a thing that exists, even if we should know better by now. Besides, if I made things easy for these characters, there would be no story. :)
>> 
>> Thanks for your feedback, and I hope this helped!

>>> **u/Nimelennar** [+1]  (a day later)
>>> 
>>> Yeah, I think it was the energy line I had the most problems with.  We've launched, for example, New Horizons (400kg) with enough velocity to escape the solar system, so sending a few 75kg humans to the Centauri system shouldn't be an issue, energy-wise.  Would they survive the journey, given current technology?  Of course not.  Sending them with enough resources (food, water, air, electricity) to survive the journey, not to mention radiation shielding, would probably subject them to something similar to the tyranny of the rocket equation, where the higher mass would reduce the possible acceleration (and therefore the average travel velocity) and therefore extend the duration of the journey, which would require more food, which would slow them down, and make the journey longer and require more food, etc.  Even if we could make an engine powerful enough to get the journey to Centauri down within a single lifetime, the amount of food alone we'd need to include would be ridiculous.  But that's more a "how do we keep them alive" issue rather than "how do we get them there" issue.
>>> 
>>> If we want to send a corpse to Centauri, arriving in 80,000 years, we certainly have the technology to do that now, because that's about how fast New Horizons is going.  The issue we have is getting someone there *quickly*, and getting them there *alive*.

>>>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+2]  *Derp* (a day later)
>>>> 
>>>> So, I talked to my friend about this. His reply:
>>>> 
>>>> >I also noticed that chapter while reading and thought it sounded a bit funny on first glance. However, it is entirely accurate when talking about vessels for humans. Since in order to support life you'll need a big ship, and will therefore need a ton of fuel, none of which we have. This might be the article you found during your research.
>>>> 
>>>> He then proceeds to rediscover the research I lost earlier. :P
>>>> 
>>>> [https://www.wired.com/2008/08/space-limits/](https://www.wired.com/2008/08/space-limits/)
>>>> 
>>>> >And then there's the issue of fuel. It would take at least the current energy output of the entire world to send a probe to the nearest star, according to Brice N. Cassenti, an associate professor with the Department of Engineering and Science at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute. That's a generous figure: More likely, Cassenti says, it would be as much as 100 times that. "We just can't extract the resources from the Earth," Cassenti said during his presentation. "They just don't exist. We would need to mine the outer planets."
>>>> 
>>>> The article is about a decade old, but considering this story takes place in 1995, that's not really an issue.
>>>> 
>>>> The whole bit about an unmanned mission with a floating corpse was just Harry brainstorming, he wouldn't actually do that. :) If anything, he would want a manned mission, a complete human caravan to start a colony. So now he has the fuel problem, in addition to keeping everyone alive. It's a tall order, but who knows, maybe the Boy-Who-Lived will munchkin his way out of it.
>>>> 
>>>> Thanks for your feedback, it's keeping me on my toes. :)

>>>>> **u/JackStargazer** [+3]  *Primordial Apologist* (a day later)
>>>>> 
>>>>> There's a bigger issue there in that there is no such thing as naturally existing plutonium. You can't mine plutonium because it doesn't exist in the Earth crust. Plutonium is created as a result of nuclear reactions. It has a short half-life, and decays into non plutonium elements.
>>>>> 
>>>>> Also regardless of that there are many designs for ships that would be perfectly capable at getting humans to and from Alpha Centauri. Fuel is not nearly as much of an issue as you think it is, because in space nothing slows you down except gravity. The only actual need for fuel is to start your journey and to slow down when you get there.

> **u/kaukamieli** [+2]  (12 hours later)
> 
> I did enjoy it.

>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (13 hours later)
>> 
>> Thanks, I'm glad you did. :)

> **u/tjhance** [+2]  (2 days later)
> 
> enjoying this so far!

>> **u/Ms_CIA** [+1]  *Derp* (2 days later)
>> 
>> Thanks, that's good to hear! \^\_\^

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