## [RT][WIP] Gobbos with Guns

* Author: u/None *
* URL: https://www.reddit.com/r/rational/comments/9k4arl/rtwip_gobbos_with_guns/
* Score: 15

* Created: 2018-09-30T06:47:42

### Post:

So, after receiving critique on my previous story, *The Vasra Journals*.  I thought I might try something different (haha! No you didn't, you just read over the first four chapters and thought it needed a rewrite but you're too lazy to do a rewrite, so instead you wanted to make something new and avoid your masochistic wish fulfillment! Got you villain! /3rd person).

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\[So I decided to try something else and apply the criticism I received—Honestly, thanks for that guys\]([https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/20385/gobbos-with-guns/chapter/288148/fray-11](https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/20385/gobbos-with-guns/chapter/288148/fray-11))

So far there's only four chapters, and I love criticism, it's what I live for. (That and french toast)

​

May Papa Nurgle bless us with his holy contagion

### Comments:

> **u/aldonius** [+3]  (5 hours later)
> 
> Intriguing! RSS-subscribed.

> **u/Trips-Over-Tail** [+2]  *Death of Crabs* (8 hours later)
> 
> I was expecting a Croc fic.

>> **u/None** [+2]  (12 hours later)
>> 
>> Okay, I'll bite, what's a croc fic?

>>> **u/Trips-Over-Tail** [+2]  *Death of Crabs* (16 hours later)
>>> 
>>> A fanfic about [Croc](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Croc:_Legend_of_the_Gobbos).

>>>> **u/None** [+1]  (16 hours later)
>>>> 
>>>> hahahaha

> **u/zombieking26** [+2]  (20 hours later)
> 
> I like it so far! Though I would recommend injecting some enpathy into your main character. I think a pure psychopathic character might get boring, sooner or later.

>> **u/None** [+2]  (20 hours later)
>> 
>> ;)
>> 
>> it's actually written in my notes

> **u/Sonderjye** [+2]  (a day later)
> 
> This is quite an interesting start. It makes a lot of sense that there'll be a total lack of compassion if he's been raised in a gobbo village. I second the suggestion for having him grow somewhat out of his upbringing somewhere down the line.   
> I also hope he gets to learn magic.

> **u/AllFuckingNamesGone** [+1]  (a day later)
> 
> Is it possible to reduce the space between paragraphs somehow, it's quite annoying to read like that.

>> **u/None** [+1]  (a day later)
>> 
>> I write in double space so I can spot mistakes quickly and edit them out without misclicking around in Google Docs (cloud storage, safety first!)
>> 
>> So I just checked out some other chapters, and other peoples' works. 
>> 
>> Yeah, it is kind of annoying, I'll make it doesn't happen in future chapters, and I got to figure out what exactly is causing it, because it seems to have happened in every chapter besides 1.3.

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