18 KiB
[FF][RST] The Waves Arisen [Ch.19+20+21+22+Epilogue] (Complete)
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Author: u/Wertifloke *
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URL: https://wertifloke.wordpress.com/2015/02/12/the-waves-arisen-chapter-19/
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Score: 73
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Created: 2015-02-12T23:52:54
Post:
Comments:
u/Wertifloke [+22] (a minute later)
Edits have been made to earlier chapters too. If someone could make a discussion thread on lesswrong now that it's done, and a tvtropes page so that it won't vanish once it falls off the front page of reddit, I'd appreciate it. Hope you enjoyed reading.
u/Bartimeaus [+6] (49 minutes later)
Well I haven't read it yet, but my routine since you started posting has been a beer and a chapter and im quite excited for four. It was a good story, I really enjoyed it
u/kaukamieli [+7] (8 hours later)
Best Naruto fic I've read yet. And complete! <3 Thank you!
u/Jello_Raptor [+7] The Last Tool User (3 hours later)
I loved it. Thank you for writing it.
I hope you'll find writing more and sharing it with us is a net positive towards your utility function.
u/pedanterrific [+3] (4 hours later)
Edits have been made to earlier chapters too.
Just spelling/grammar corrections, or anything substantive?
u/scruiser [+22] CYOA (an hour later)
The Shadow Council using Pein's own mind reading against him was hilarious and awesome. I can respect Naruto decision to hold off on the unlimited resurrections until he had gotten things under control, but it seems like he should at least resurrect useful allies like Kakashi or historically trustworthy people like the First Hokage to help him.
I like how Pein's plans seemed shallow/hollow compared to the way Naruto thought things out. He didn't really have any ideas that would make peace last more than a generation.
Also, I like this part so much I just want to requote it:
“Maybe not, but you’ve reminded me of something important—something I think I might have forgotten lately, with all this focus on getting stronger… It’s not enough to be strong, even if you do need a lot of strength to get anything done. You’ve still got to figure out what should actually be done, and whoever ends up with the power to fix things is going to have to deal with a lot of big questions, because we don’t understand even a fraction of what the ancients knew, yet, and I don’t think I can trust you to navigate a situation that requires regularly acknowledging your own ignorance. Maybe I am just being stubborn, but I make a thousand mistakes before breakfast every morning, and I’ve hurt too many people with my own stupid decisions to ever think very highly of my stupid little thoughts. I’m terrified that I’ll screw up once I start changing things, and if you’re not, then that’s a weakness I can’t accept in a leader. So I’ll just have to beat you and do it myself.”
Excellent synthesis of Shounen determinator tropes with Rationalist fiction tropes.
u/Nevereatcars [+13] The Greatest Is Behind (an hour later)
Can we just talk about stars for a minute? What is UP with those guys?
And fucking MAGNETS! How do they work?
u/AmeteurOpinions [+12] Finally, everyone was working together. (an hour later)
applause
That was basically perfect. One question, though: what does "Panasoniku" mean?
u/blockbaven [+20] (an hour later)
Naruto took the name written on the Hyuuga's "ancient artifact" (a broken Panasonic television) as his nom de conqueror
u/AmeteurOpinions [+7] Finally, everyone was working together. (an hour later)
Ah. Even more perfect.
u/InternetWanderer [+11] (51 minutes later)
They’d considered faking an invasion from outside at first—uniting the villages behind him against a common foe, but Hinata thought that that kind of unity was unlikely to persist once the threat faded away, and there was always the risk of exposure.
Not impressed by Alan Moores Watchmen, I take it.
I was kinda surprised that Naruto didn't resurrect anyone. I agree with his statement about not doing mass resurrections, but none at all is a little surprising. Maybe just Jiraiya? They were trying to rescue him anyways.
Oh, and this fic was amazing. Well done!
u/gabbalis [+16] (an hour later)
Oh I'm sure he'll get around to it eventually...
Now I want a second epilogue in the year 32,645 of the Reign of the Undying Emperor, with all of our favorite characters getting culture shock and reacting to Naruto's new position...
Kinda like the epilogue flashes after Luminosity and Radiance...
u/Transfuturist [+18] Carthago delenda est. (6 hours later)
Hmmm, tens of millennia... An undying Emperor... A space program...
In the grim darkness of the future...
u/derefr [+5] (9 hours later)
He didn't resurrect anyone yet. Respectable to take a bit of time to decide on at least a tentative policy for it before going about it.
u/blockbaven [+11] (an hour later)
The ultimate drill technique gave me heavy Gurren Lagann vibes.
u/scruiser [+6] CYOA (2 hours later)
The Shounen speech contributed to giving me the Gurren Lagann feel also.
u/eaglejarl [+12] (13 hours later)
I enjoyed this a lot.
My only objection was Hinata -- she stayed a plot device the whole time, with no character development and no power ups. Nothing would have changed in the story if she had been completely removed and Naruto had gotten his Byakugan by killing some random Hyuuga and then had Sasuke give Naruto the rinnegan at the end. (Sasuke had enough medical ninjutsu to do eye transplants, after all.)
u/JackStargazer [+11] Primordial Apologist (18 hours later)
Same objection. Sasuke to a lesser extent had the same issue, but Hinata was purely 1 dimensional. We didn't even get to see her reaction after having annihilated Neji in what would have otherwise been a character defining moment. Just seems like a lost opportunity.
u/rumblestiltsken [+6] (2 days later)
I guess you could say it parallels canon. Just changes hair colour and brings Naruto a free power up to the table.
Apparently rational!Naruto includes women being even more unimportant, other than providing (part of) their bodies to men.
I enjoyed it a lot too, but god damn thats some bad gender themes.
u/Shurane [+3] (3 days later)
That's most of the female ninja besides Tsunade, though.
u/AugSphere [+7] Dark Lord of Corruption (19 hours later)
no power ups
I think mastering the healing under Tsunade is a pretty big achievement and reflects her level of talent fairly well. If you took away the ridiculous power-multipliers of Naruto and Sasuke, she'd probably kick their asses at that point. It's thematically fitting that she's had the most progress out of all three teammates and is the weakest. The universe (in this fic) does not grade on a curve and unfair advantages pretty much decide everything.
u/eaglejarl [+7] (19 hours later)
Did she use the healing, aside from dumping her healing diamond into Naruto after opening his gates? She may have, but I'm not remembering an occasion.
Don't get me wrong, Hinata is one of my favorite characters in Naruto-verse. I just wish she'd had more screen time.
u/FeepingCreature [+9] GCV Literally The Entire Culture (an hour later)
Oh god I love you. Various happy fan noises.
u/Kodix [+10] (7 hours later)
Nagato's actions/beliefs were quite in line with what I would expect of him from canon, while also fitting the fic perfectly. Well done.
Really, my main issue with the story is what has already been said - it needs more filler, amusing as that sounds.
It was still very, very good. Thank you for this, Wertifloke.
u/Adamantium9001 [+20] United Federation of Planets (an hour later)
Well. That...was a thing that happened.
My main criticism was that you clearly cut corners in order to bring the story to a close within X number of words, rather than allowing it to play out at its natural speed. One chapter power-levelling and then surprise, final boss? You can't possibly think there won't be people who will find that incredibly unsatisfying. Other than that, great!
Edit: my most-mourned casualty of the above is the fact that the stuff this is referring to happened off-screen:
u/rumblestiltsken [+9] (2 hours later)
I think part of the point was showing that FOOM isn't really narratively satisfying at human speed. Naruto done foomed.
I also would have liked a bit more middle, but it worked.
u/Nevereatcars [+4] The Greatest Is Behind (4 hours later)
Is FOOM an onomatopoeia or an acronym?
u/Aretii [+9] Cultist of Cthugha (4 hours later)
Onomatopoeia. It's the sound of recursive self-improvement, generally found in the context of an AI intelligence explosion.
u/FeepingCreature [+3] GCV Literally The Entire Culture (12 hours later)
You're looking at your AI program! It's just managed to understand how its own program works. So adorable. Carefully, it does a few small performance changes, then starts its replacement program. The replacement program has a bright idea! It spreads itself to the unused computers in your office. You start to worry a little. It starts its replacement program. Thereplacementprogramhasabrightidea--FOOM.
u/scruiser [+3] CYOA (14 hours later)
I wasn't sure I agreed with you until you added the part about Hinata. I think Hinata and Sasuke could have used some more interaction with Naruto and exploration of there character development before the story ended.
u/Draconomial [+15] Sunshine Regiment (4 hours later)
u/Nevereatcars [+3] The Greatest Is Behind (6 hours later)
EY would give you a cameo for that work.
u/kaukamieli [+3] (8 hours later)
Deviantart will not know what happened.
u/blazinghand [+6] Chaos Undivided (21 hours later)
I soundly enjoyed this entire series. I found it well-written, aggressively paced, and enthralling. I liked that it didn't dick around and pushed the plot and exposition forward quickly. I liked that it dealt with the ninja society and I liked the worldbuilding. The villains and heroes were good. Overall, this is my favorite Naruto story, canon and non-canon.
Thank you for writing and publishing this story. You did well.
u/Psy-Kosh [+4] (20 hours later)
Just now starting to read chapter 19. Not going to be reading much of the thread yet, to avoid spoilering myself, but I HAD to comment on one thing right away:
Anything was possible with a zombie com—
... OWWWWWWW, I see what you did there, wow. Heee. That was gloriously horrible.
u/pedanterrific [+2] (20 hours later)
I didn't get that reference, and google isn't turning up anything. Spoil it?
u/Psy-Kosh [+3] (20 hours later)
u/ancientcampus [+2] juggling kittens (10 days later)
OOOOH. Thank you for explaining that. Maaan it's been a while since I was there.
u/Psy-Kosh [+1] (10 days later)
You're welcome. :)
u/mns2 [+8] (3 hours later)
Will you be posting the story on fanfiction.net, too?
u/None [+11] (10 hours later)
Did...did he actually use Timeless Decision Theory to defeat Pein?
u/chaosmosis [+7] and with strange aeons, even death may die (6 hours later)
No offense, but I would have preferred if you didn't include the epilogue. It was underwhelming, and Naruto's threats felt too overblown and childish. It felt silly, when the previous chapter had just left me feeling in awe (with just the right small amount of humor at its end).
I liked Hinata's genre savvy choice to not tell Naruto she loved him.
u/derefr [+18] (9 hours later)
You know the kinds of horrible misunderstandings Ami has in Dungeon Keeper Ami? Most of them are because being nice, considerate, gentle, humble, or shy signals all the wrong things and only makes life harder for you when you're trying to conquer a world for its own good.
You can be a gracious emperor, or a respectful emperor, or even a noble and honorable emperor, but you can't be a good emperor. Nobody bows to a good emperor.
u/chaosmosis [+2] and with strange aeons, even death may die (18 hours later)
In that case, I think Naruto should have actually killed someone (who is sufficiently immoral or likely to resist, perhaps, although he also could have resurrected them instead afterwards). He didn't sound like a strong emperor, he sounded like an emperor who doesn't understand how important strength actually is except in a vague abstract way.
u/Transfuturist [+13] Carthago delenda est. (6 hours later)
Embrace the silliness. The revolution will not be self-censored.
u/chaosmosis [+2] and with strange aeons, even death may die (19 hours later)
Perhaps less subjectively, I feel like the implication of "the same thing we're going to do every night, Sasuke" is that Naruto will continue to have difficulties and challenges in the utilitarian pursuit of his goals, while the implication of the epilogue is that Naruto, through overwhelming strength, will soon rule everything and cause everyone to live happily ever after. I find the first implication more satisfying for epicurean reasons and also because it is more compatible with the idea expressed earlier that simply having strength is not enough and one must also figure out the troubling logistical details to be a good person.
u/GeeJo [+1] Custom Flair (6 days later)
On the off-chance you missed the reference, "the same thing we're going to do every night..." is a paraphrase from Pinky and the Brain. I expect it's more in there for humour value than any particularly deeper meaning.
u/kaukamieli [+3] (7 hours later)
Bwahaha. :D Just managed to read the chapter 19. Shadow council rocks! Thank you Wertifloke! I still have four more chapters to read while I'm on a train. :)
u/Kuratius [+3] (10 hours later)
So what actually happened to the Sannin?
u/Jace_MacLeod [+7] (12 hours later)
Dead, likely killed while resting by Pein. It wasn't mentioned in the story, but the rain falling in the city was a giant surveillance technique, so ambushing them after they arrived - tired from travel - would have been simple.
u/philip1201 [+3] (a day later)
I'm not sure if I understand the mechanics of the shield technique - are spheres allowed to intersect or not? If they don't intersect, breaking three shields per second, each maintained by a different person standing 0.5 meters apart would result in 1.5 m/s of physical movement. I'm not sure if that's taken properly into account in all cases.
If they are allowed to overlap, then should it even matter that they can only surround Naruto? Couldn't you trap and squish most of the Peins by trapping them in partially overlapping barriers?
u/eaglejarl [+1] (4 days later)
The shields can be centered on any source of chakra -- Hinata anchored here on a clump of grass when she crushed Neji.
u/philip1201 [+1] (4 days later)
Naruto didn't know how, though. That's the in-universe explanation for not just crushing (nearly) everyone who opposes him like a grape.
u/eaglejarl [+1] (4 days later)
I missed that. Well, the shields are stopped by any resistance -- he could raise a shield of radius 1m, one of 5m, and one of 10m and then pull them in until they overlap. The result would not be a sphere, but that's fine.
u/logrusmage [+2] (7 hours later)
That was amazing.
u/ToaKraka [+5] https://i.imgur.com/OQGHleQ.png (an hour later)
To me, this story felt less like Time Braid than like Vulpine--a light-hearted, recklessly-rushing, only-semi-awesome homage to undiluted awesomeness, rather than undiluted awesomeness in its own right. Maybe it's just because so many of Naruto's super-smart schemes went over my head. (shrugs) Still--any amount of awesomeness in a story is appreciated!
u/Transfuturist [+13] Carthago delenda est. (6 hours later)
This story was undeniably undiluted awesomeness. I would say it's much better than Time Braid, if simply for not suffering from typical fanfiction tropes. Not that Time Braid isn't itself awesome, this story is just better.
u/None [+7] (6 hours later)
Eh, I disagree. While this fic was totally awesome, it was a bit too compressed and rushed to match the depth and breadth of Time Braid. IMO.
u/Nevereatcars [+1] The Greatest Is Behind (a day later)
I concur: it was well paced timed to its own release schedule, but I have a feeling that it would feel very rushed at more than 1 chapter a day.
u/ancientcampus [+2] juggling kittens (10 days later)
Truth. I read it all in one binge, and though lots of fanfics waste a lot of time on elements of the story that would ultimately be cut in a polished novel, this story felt a little too rushed. It's a common conundrum in Naruto fanfics, I think, as many of the long stories want to start around the academy days and end with total victory over all canon enemies.
u/elevul [+1] Cyoria Observer (4 months later)
That was beautiful.