28 KiB
[RST] Pokemon: The Origin of Species, Chapter 45 - Goal Factoring
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Author: u/DaystarEld Pokémon Professor*
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URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9794740/45/Pokemon-The-Origin-of-Species
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Score: 75
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Created: 2017-07-01T11:47:42
Post:
Comments:
u/CopperZirconium [+18] (17 hours later)
No wonder Aiko has problems with her father, he's an NPC!
u/empocariam [+6] (18 hours later)
I felt bad for the guy. I got some late in life second language acquisition vibes from him, coupled with some really traumatic experience, can make a person seem really uncomfortable.
u/DaystarEld [+16] Pokémon Professor (2 minutes later)
Hey everyone, welcome back to, say it with me now, the New Longest Chapter Yet! Lots of notes this time around, so bear with me:
First, I had an amazing time this month at the Center for Applied Rationality workshop in Seattle. It was tons of fun, I met all sorts of interesting and unique people, and I learned quite a lot about myself and various tools available to upgrade my thinking and perspectives. If you're curious to learn more you should totally check out their site! The title of this chapter is based on one of their techniques, and I'm going to try and draw Red's out and upload it to my site soon so you can get a better picture of what it looks like.
Second, in case it's not quite clear in the story: abra can't be used to teleport others. They can only teleport their trainer, since it requires a full-mind-meld to bring them along.
Third, some amazing readers have made some amazing fan creations! Check out my site for links to some awesome fan art and an audio play of the first chapter, which was just delightful and a fantastic surprise for me.
Finally, I wanted to repeat once again that, while I enjoy and appreciate and value guest reviews, remember that fanfiction literally does not allow me to respond to them, so please keep that in mind if you leave reviews that have questions in them but are not signed in :) Additionally, fanfiction will block anything that looks like a website or email address, so if you try to leave those in your reviews, Guest or otherwise, I cannot follow up on them as they will just look like empty spaces in the reviews.
Enjoy, and all feedback welcome, as usual!
u/abstractwhiz [+8] Friendly Eldritch Abomination (12 hours later)
Aha, that explains the name! I saw that name and immediately thought "Someone just went to CFAR". :P
u/TK17Studios [+6] Author of r!Animorphs: The Reckoning (20 hours later)
Me, too.
u/DaystarEld [+2] Pokémon Professor (2 days later)
Yep! It dovetailed nicely into a major theme of the chapter anyway, so made sense to include it :)
u/masasin [+3] (10 hours later)
Awesome chapter. I'd love to get a notification when you upload the goal factoring.
u/DaystarEld [+6] Pokémon Professor (10 hours later)
I have an RSS for my site, but I'm not sure how it works... it should send a notification out to anyone signed up for it when I post something.
u/masasin [+3] (14 hours later)
Haven't used RSS since the Google Reader days, but I'll see if I can subscribe. Thanks again!
u/leakycauldron [+22] Imperium of Man (2 hours later)
You're a very talented writer. And so handsome. How much do I have to compliment you for Aiko to stay?
u/SometimesATroll [+13] (2 hours later)
I'll pitch in if it helps. DaystarEld, you have excellent fashion sense and I really appreciate your facial hair (or lack thereof).
u/Sailor_Vulcan [+7] Champion of Justice and Reason (4 hours later)
On the one hand, having more trainers join the party would be a pretty big diversion from the original games. On the other hand, I can see the appeal of having more main characters to focus on. Maybe there should be more teams of major side characters whose perspectives we get to see. I mean we already are starting to do get something like this but it's mostly just individual side characters, rather than recurring teams of them. It would be interesting to do something like what Sonic Heroes did. The main team is Red Blue, Leaf and Aiko. Then you could add others.
BTW why didn't you name her Kerria instead of Aiko? Then you could have had all four of the Gen 1 colors represented among the protagonists. Seriously this was a huge missed opportunity.
u/DaystarEld [+8] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Who's Kerria? o_O Never heard of her... is that like an alternate name for Yellow from the manga?
Edit: Aah, it's a type of yellow flower in Japan, that makes sense :)
I've been thinking of adding a "Yellow" character to the story for awhile, but if I do I would first want to actually read the manga some so I could get a sense of their character (Leaf is essentially an OC, but I have nothing in particular in mind for Yellow) and what their role in the story would be.
u/TheTrickFantasic [+4] (17 days later)
If it helps kick-start any seed-ideas (and at the risk of being mildly spoilery), here are a few facts about manga!Yellow:
Her attitude towards Pokémon is very benevolent and empathetic. This likely stems from her special ability to heal and understand Pokémon via touch, which she was born with. This goes so far that Pokémon healing is considered her 'specialty', same as how Pokémon battling is manga!Red's, Pokémon training is manga!Blue's, and catching Pokémon is manga!Crystal's.
As a result of her attitude, her battling style focuses heavily on subduing enemy Pokémon without actually injuring them. It was her skill in controlling a battle in this manner that convinced manga!Prof. Oak to let her be the main character of the Yellow Saga. (Even though we later find out she's also super-naïve, and somehow doesn't even know about metamorphosis... wut? -_-)
Her home is Viridian City, and her first Pokémon was a Rattata. She also wears a cool straw hat, which at some point gets the rainbow and silver feathers in it (which are the keys to TIME TRAVEL - seriously).
So, with the above, maybe one idea could be that OoS!Yellow is a psychic like Red, but focused on applying her powers to further veterinary research and care. That could make her a foil to Red, i.e. pure versus applied science, and her battling style could make her another foil to Blue. She would likely have a similar stance as Leaf on Pokémon treatment, but because of her psychic/empathic abilities has a more extreme position? If her primary interest is in veterinary medicine, she could have an understanding of Pokémon biology that exceeds even what Red has studied in that field (specialist vs generalist).
Considering all of the above, she could maybe have a role to play whenever Pokémon biology/medicine/biomedical ethics/humane treatment/time travel (jk!) gets the limelight?
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (17 days later)
Ahh neat. As you kind of mention she does seem really similar to my version of Leaf, with her battle style and higher empathy, but I don't really know how Leaf in the manga is so maybe the distinction is a lot bigger.
Healing powers would be a massive break of how my world works (human psychics are not powerful enough to heal pokemon) but it could be worked in with just a lot of experience raising and taking care of them, which is very similar to Aiko.
I guess we'll see. I might actually just change her name to Kerria at this point XD
u/TheTrickFantasic [+2] (18 days later)
Green (English translation) in the manga was initially a shady character. She's first introduced as a con-artist who dupes Red, and from there on has a supporting/anti-heroine role until things get really epic (outrageous) in Saffron City. She originally stole her Squirtle and Pokedex from Prof. Oak, and the conclusion to her character arc in the Red Saga is being forgiven after explaining why she turned to theft and scams.
Healing powers would be a massive break of how my world works (human psychics are not powerful enough to heal pokemon)
I remembered that, but I get how my post might have been misleading. I was thinking more along the lines of how the ESP aspects could be used for diagnosis, calming Pokémon during/prior/post treatment, and understanding the effects of treatments from the perspective of the patient Pokémon.
u/ketura [+4] Organizer (10 hours later)
On the one hand, having more trainers join the party would be a pretty big diversion from the original games.
Ah yes, we'd go from a 200% increase to a 300% increase. The originals all have only one person traveling, so claiming that this of all things is a "big diversion" seems like blowing things out of proportion.
u/waylandertheslayer [+6] (a day later)
Dunno, the games are about solo journeys but the anime has teams of three and the manga has three main characters (at least the Red-centric arc).
I agree that adding another person isn't a huge change but disagree that three-person teams are out-of-canon.
u/ketura [+3] Organizer (a day later)
shrugs he didn't say "canon", he said "games". I would agree with you, but it's not like the anime was ever capped at three characters either.
u/DaystarEld [+6] Pokémon Professor (2 days later)
you have excellent fashion sense
This is probably the first time anyone's ever said that to me. I think it's fitting that it was done as a form of shameless pandering XD
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (2 days later)
I think creators are probably less likely to change their work when they have a bigger ego, so in actuality you're going about this all wrong. Not that I'm complaining :D
u/daydev [+10] (9 hours later)
So nobody's talking about the "ero" mystery. Did everyone figure it out immediately and I'm the only one not getting it?
My best guess is it has something to do with the old pokedex, something like "New Folder" or "Document1", only the pokedex somehow glitched and it's actually "ERROR", "ERROR1", etc. (English is not my first language, but I think you're not supposed to distinguish double letters, so "ero" and "erro" would sound the same).
u/PositivePeter [+14] (9 hours later)
My guess was that there is no pattern. Each command is one attack, they're just confusingly named to trick the opponent into thinking there's some pattern to it and waste time trying to figure it out.
u/Salivanth [+13] (16 hours later)
I think there is some pattern - "Ero" means Poison Powder for one Pokemon, and Sand Attack for another. I think "Ero" means "disabling/controlling attack", while "Ero 2" might mean "evasive attack" or something. Like how people try and keep all their hotkeys similar between different MMO characters, even if the spells themselves are different.
u/LucidityWaver [+11] (18 hours later)
In a similar vein to "disabling/controlling attacks", I was thinking Ero is just short for erode. "Fast" was obviously quick attack. So my guess would be that they're descriptive, but my model wouldn't explain Ero 2. Perhaps Ero stage 2, as in, wait for current status effects and erode the opponent's stamina.
I think determining Ero vs Ero 2 seems like it could cause undue hesitation in fast paced battling evironment.
u/thrawnca [+5] Carbon-based biped (3 days later)
"Erode" makes sense, given that we also saw her use "Fast". So she likes to describe the style of attack.
But yeah, there would be a split-second delay for the Pokémon to distinguish 1 and 2.
u/LucidityWaver [+3] (3 days later)
But yeah, there would be a split-second delay for the Pokémon to distinguish 1 and 2
My thinking was that Aiko doesn't seem as clever as the other characters. Or perhaps she's just more 'child-like' or naive.
Following that logic, Aiko's tactic probably isn't as clever, or strategic as some of the other tactics we've seen. At least in this way.
That may also be why it's harder for Blue to figure out; he's trying to figure it out as though it doesn't have an obvious fault.
u/daydev [+6] (17 hours later)
I thought about that, but from Blue's POV it seemed like there's more to it than just "all commands are Ero N in random order for all Pokemon". It makes sense, because this way you can't learn code names (like "Bai"), which code name corresponds to which attack depends on which Pokemon is out. But then what "Ero" means? If it's just a nonsense word, it seems "unfair" narratively. And if that's the code, why not drop "Ero" and just use "1", "2", etc. "Ero one", "Ero two", etc seem a bit too long to say to be optimal. If "Ero" is her analogue of "Ok, Google" to avoid accidental activation, replace numbers with something which serves the same purpose, but is not common words, like numbers in a foreign language or "alpha", "bravo", etc.
u/DaystarEld [+8] Pokémon Professor (9 hours later)
You are indeed the first person to try and figure out the code! :)
u/thrawnca [+3] Carbon-based biped (a day later)
I don't think anyone has figured it out.
They do all seem like attacks to be used against a stronger opponent, though, which may be significant.
u/DaystarEld [+5] Pokémon Professor (2 days later)
Someone has in fact figured it out, but the message alerting them of that is private so that others can continue to try and figure it out if they want to :)
u/DCarrier [+4] (2 days later)
I'm wondering if it might have been "aero". Like those are attacks that move through the air. Blue assumed that it was in code. Red solved it easily because he did not.
Edit: Or it could be even simpler. She's just saying "air" with a Japanese accent.
u/thrawnca [+3] Carbon-based biped (2 days later)
"Ero 2" was Dig, though, right?
u/SometimesATroll [+9] (an hour later)
Well darn, it's looking more and more like Aiko won't be joining the crew. Of course, she could always pull a Her Dad and just say "I'm leaving. Bye." and then leave. Maybe she'll pull out some paper and decide that leaving is what fulfills her goals.
u/None [+8] (4 hours later)
Thanks for the great chapter!
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Glad you liked it!
u/Zurrdroid [+9] (5 hours later)
Another great chapter! You're very good at making character interactions have weight. Speaking of, though, that weight has done a number on my heartstrings. Why do you perpetuate this pain, YOU MONSTER
u/DaystarEld [+4] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Thank you! And also mwahahaha!
u/KnickersInAKnit [+8] (6 hours later)
I just had a crazy thought occur to me. Aiko's going to stay behind, and after the trio leave that's when Giovanni will recruit her to be his spy, with the promise of funding her travel.
u/None [+8] (6 hours later)
[removed]
u/The_Magus_199 [+10] Ankh-Morpork City Watch (2 days later)
with the promise of funding her father, maybe?
u/DaystarEld [+5] Pokémon Professor (2 minutes later)
Typo thread!
u/CrystalShadow [+35] (4 hours later)
"She's a good girl. When she's older, she'll be ready"->"She's a good girl. She is ready to go with you now"
u/DaystarEld [+11] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Fixed, than-WAAAIT a minute!
Thanks for the laugh :)
u/Hermaan [+5] (an hour later)
"A drips down Mr. Sakai's face." -> "A tear drips down Mr. Sakai's face."
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Fixed!
u/CarVac [+5] (41 minutes later)
"bring their out for socializing" -> "bring theirs out for socializing"
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Fixed, thank you!
u/CarVac [+4] (53 minutes later)
"causing Re to" -> "causing Red to"
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Fixed, thanks!
u/KnickersInAKnit [+4] (2 hours later)
Celadon -> Cerulean
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Fixed!
u/Grasmel [+3] (4 hours later)
Leaf stares horror -> Leaf stares in horror
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
Fixed!
u/None [+5] (6 hours later)
[removed]
u/DaystarEld [+4] Pokémon Professor (8 hours later)
All fixed, and thank you!
u/None [+4] (9 hours later)
[removed]
u/DaystarEld [+4] Pokémon Professor (10 hours later)
Okay, edited it again!
u/xamueljones [+4] My arch-enemy is entropy (2 days later)
When Red was explaining what it was like to be psychic to his mother by comparing it to be deaf person being able to hear:
Red smiles ruefully. "It's pretty amazing. Like… I don't know, getting a hearing implant must be, for someone born deaf. But it's a lot of hard work too, and I still can't do a lot of things I thought I'd be able to. I can't even lift a stupid rock."
I would advise against that metaphor. Cochlear implants are a subject of controversy in the Deaf culture since they often view it as 'forcing' people to fit in when for those who are born deaf and receive the implants late in life (not hearing aids though since they don't require surgeries). It takes years of practice and hearing therapy to be able to hear as well as a hearing person (if ever). For many Deaf, they are skeptical of the 'benefits' that cochlear implants bring. While they don't have issue with teens or adults choosing to get them of their own volition, there are issues with hearing parents deciding that their deaf child should get the implants to be "cured". For example in the media about cochlear implants, we almost always see the parents gushing about the implants, but the children are rarely shown being asked for their opinions before or after.
If you did want to use a metaphor with controversial implications just like how there is controversy associated with psychics in your story, then it's a very good choice. But if you simply wanted to use an analogy of using a sense for the first time, then I would recommend the blind seeing color for the first time instead.
Whoops, I went off in a tangent. I'm fine with the metaphor itself, but I thought you might want to know about any potential issues with it and I'm willing to answer any qeustions you may have.
u/DaystarEld [+6] Pokémon Professor (2 days later)
So this is actually something I'm aware of but did not in this case use intentionally to parallel the controversy about psychics, which makes me feel like I should change it for that reason, while at the same time I'm still navigating how I feel about it and whether including it with such muddled intentions does it justice.
For now I think I'm going to keep it in because I know how Red would react to the idea that medically curing a disability isn't an obvious and uncomplicated good. (Which may be in part influenced by the much more advanced medical technologies available in the Pokemon world, but may not be too).
I do thank you for bringing it up so I could think about it more, though!
u/DerSaidin [+3] (21 hours later)
"So, once I've got my goals and my negatives, I can either start checking new actions against this one to see if they fulfill all the same goals but have less negatives, or have the same amount of negatives but fulfill more goals."
Either or
u/DaystarEld [+2] Pokémon Professor (a day later)
Mind clarifying this?
u/DerSaidin [+3] (a day later)
Should be this
"So, once I've got my goals and my negatives, I can start checking new actions against this one to see if they either fulfill all the same goals but have less negatives, or have the same amount of negatives but fulfill more goals."
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (a day later)
Ah, I see, fixed!
u/thrawnca [+3] Carbon-based biped (a day later)
"I'm mostly just talking out loud" - should be "thinking", but you can blame this one on Leaf's tiredness.
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (a day later)
Fixed, thanks!
u/Laborbuch [+2] (13 days later)
Ch 42
The language of his original research paper was too focused on trying to support his hypothesis of a correlation between Other and psychic ability. He also felt misrepresented the meaning of his p-value, considering the lack of statistical significance.
I think there’s something missing before misrepresented.
Well, if this pattern holds up, you won’t have to worry about that any more. It might take you a bit to convince a paper to pay attention, but the journal boards aren’t stupid enough to ignore something like this.
‘convince a paper’?
u/DaystarEld [+2] Pokémon Professor (13 days later)
Both fixed, thanks!
u/nipplelightpride [+2] (17 days later)
"fiddling with his helmet" -> "fiddles with his helmet"
u/DaystarEld [+2] Pokémon Professor (17 days later)
I think it's okay as is, no? He thinks as he fiddles with his helmet, then puts it on. If I say "thinks, fiddles with his helmet, then puts it on" it sound like he thinks first, then fiddles with his helmet after thinking.
u/nipplelightpride [+2] (17 days later)
Maybe? It's a bit weird to refer to the helmet as "it" when the word "helmet" is in something that reads as a nonessential phrase. That's why I read it as more of a series of events.
u/DaystarEld [+2] Pokémon Professor (17 days later)
Ahh, I see what you mean. Yeah that is a bit awkward, I'll see if I can reword it, thanks!
u/DerSaidin [+6] (22 hours later)
" I've never had to win their loyalty: they gave it to me from what I've accomplished, from my legend."
This is winning their loyalty, isn't it?
u/JulianDelphiki2 [+10] (22 hours later)
I think the point is that Blue needs their loyalty to achieve his goals while prof. Oak got it as a side effect from his accomplishments.
u/thrawnca [+7] Carbon-based biped (a day later)
It's not from any personal interaction, though. He didn't have to specifically work with John Smith and earn his trust through friendship or leadership; John just implicitly trusted the hero. Not immediately useful for advising Blue.
u/ShadyKage [+7] (a day later)
I really enjoy your writing, my only complaint is that I hate waiting for the next to be released! I know some have said they think adding Aiko to the story would make for too many perspectives and possibly drag out the story. I agree, but I also like her! I thought that maybe she would work well as a constant side character the way she has been so far. You may have already considered this, but I wanted to mention it. Whatever happens, the story is still awesome and I can't wait for the next chapter!
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (a day later)
Thank you, glad you enjoyed it! And believe me, I hate waiting for the next chapter too ;)
u/DerSaidin [+5] (22 hours later)
"When we get to Vermilion," he eventually says, "after the cruise, you should find a ride back to Unova and set an abra teleport there. Then you can come back and go visit whenever you want."
Red should have taken a ride back to Pallet town with Prof. Oak to do this himself. If he sets an Abra to TP to their current location, he can override that with a new location later, right?
u/DaystarEld [+4] Pokémon Professor (a day later)
Yes, but his mom isn't in Pallet anymore :) Also he only has two abra for personal use, and he's keeping one registered to Bill's.
u/GriffinJ [+4] (2 days later)
Hey, just picked up the story on Sunday and ended up binging it until I caught up. I just wanted you to know that I really enjoy your take on the world of pokemon. It's fascinating to have a game I grew up playing as a kid re-contextualized as a truly dangerous and fleshed out world. It reminds of when people talk about doing the Nuzlocke challenge in the games. I hadn't really thought about the more emotional implications behind it until you're serial made me look at it from a more realistic point of view. I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (2 days later)
Thank you, I'm glad you've enjoyed it so much!
u/sidhe3141 [+5] (2 days later)
Anyone else get an "animal hoarder" feeling from her dad?
u/Golden_Magician [+5] (4 days later)
Hey, I'm a bit late to the party but I realized that I haven't been commenting much lately and since I feel guilty about it I wanted to leave my own small contribution! This story is always the highlight of the start of a new month for me and it really has grown into something special. This chapter allowed the main characters to look into their character arcs, in a way, in order to decide which direction -they- wanna go. It's as if you, the author, were giving them the freedom to choose their own path as opposed to letting the demands of the plot to dictate it. It might be an illusion, but it's (super) effective!
Red's conflict with his mother seems a bit petty at first, but then you realize it holds a sense of familiarity. It's actually a fairly realistic teen-parent conflict moment in its scope and execution. Concerning Red's future, I am really exited about his finding some big mystery or problem to work on: right now his research has been for the sake of the research itself, but when he finds something he's truly passionate about (for whatever reason) this focus will move on to the object itself. The psychic interludes are always a joy to read.
As for Blue, his character establishing moments with his grandpa were truly heartwarming and showed a softer side of him. He's still my favorite character to read about because I'm a sucker for this kind of ambition-driven rise to greatness journey, so I'm ready to enjoy the Blue ride!
Finally, Leaf is where the story has unexpectedly grown on me the most: I went from being pretty uninterested in her character and story arc in general to genuinely enjoying it. I think it has some great potential, conspiracies aside, to highlight some of the ethical grey zones of the pokemon universe, while making her question her own firm and somewhat black-and-white beliefs at the same time. That would truly be awesome.
I think that's all for now..oh yeah, the new character! I kinda like her, but I feel like I am supposed to like her and sympathize with her, which makes me want to not like her despite it. Yet I also have the feeling she might have some hidden depths after all. By the way, is her father supposed to represent the pokemon daycare from the games?
u/DaystarEld [+3] Pokémon Professor (4 days later)
It might be an illusion, but it's (super) effective!
Made me smile :) Glad you enjoyed the chapter!
I kinda like her, but I feel like I am supposed to like her and sympathize with her, which makes me want to not like her despite it.
Manipulative? Me? Nooo, perish the thought >.>
By the way, is her father supposed to represent the pokemon daycare from the games?
Yep!
Thanks for the review!
u/BabaGannoosh [+2] (9 days later)
I'm looking forward to hearing more of the story of Nobunga - 'historical' pokemon use could be really interesting to flesh out a little!
u/DaystarEld [+2] Pokémon Professor (9 days later)
Yeah, I've been thinking about writing a chapter that's an excerpt from it, but it's one of those things that would really just slow the story down. I agree that it would be a cool time period of the pokemon world to explore :)
u/BabaGannoosh [+2] (9 days later)
Yeah - I think it's fertile material for a fanfic-er with a good imagination to explore