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[RT][HSF][HF][TH]Onward To Providence Episode IV: Camping Tales

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So I'm still interested in any critique or commentary, either in the thread or right here. It's nice to hear good things but I'm also curious about anything that bothers people about the story. Things too dull? Things that really grate or bother you?

Improvement is harder when all you get is praise.

Space Battles link for that.

You can also read it on Sufficient Velocity.

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